How do I know if I have a problem?
Filters and Accountability Reports
- Having sexual sites bookmarked
- Joining sexual sites to gain access to online sexual material
- Searching for sexual material through an Internet search tool
- Spending money for online or phone sexual material
- Participating in sexually related chats
- Using sexualized usernames or nicknames on the Internet
- Masturbating while viewing sexual material
- Accessing sexual sites from multiple computers
- Taking increased risks online (giving out one's name and phone number, meeting people offline, etc.)
- Experiencing significant physiological changes while visiting sexual Internet areas (e.g. increase in heart rate, sweaty palms)
- Viewing more pornography, for longer periods of time, or seeking more hard-core pornography to get the same level of excitement as at first
- Spending time planning when you can view sexual material
- Spending inordinate amounts of time obtaining sexual material
- Having online sexual affairs or encounters
- Engaging in online fantasy that would be illegal if carried out
- Neglecting important social, relationship, occupational, or recreational activities to view pornography
- Continuing the behavior despite it having caused or having the potential to cause significant problems (such as legal risk, risk of job loss, interference with spiritual or religious life, relationship difficulties, financial problems)
- Continuing the behavior in spite of family and friends expressing concern about your online behavior
- hiding the behavior from others (moving the computer monitor so others cannot see it, lying, using the computer at times when others aren't around, worrying about others finding out)
- Repeated attempts and promises to stop using pornography and consequent repeated failure
- Wanting to stop but feeling unable to stop
- After stopping viewing pornography, the desire to view it again gets stronger and stronger
- Getting on the Internet for something else but ending up viewing pornography
- Using pornography as a reward; to escape, deny, or numb feelings; or to avoid problems
- Feeling anxious, angry, or disappointed when unable to access pornography
- Guilt or shame connected with pornography use
- Punishing self for using pornography
What's the Big Deal about Pornography? A Guide for the Internet Generation (2008), Jill C. Manning. Shadow Mountain Press, Salt Lake City, UT.
Confronting Pornography: A Guide to Prevention and Recovery for Individuals, Loved Ones, and Leaders (2005), Mark Chamberlain, Dan Gray, & Rory Reid (Editors). Deseret Book, Salt Lake City, UT.
Healing the Wounds of Sexual Addiction (2004). Mark Laaser. Zondervan Publishing, Grand Rapids, Michigan.
In the Shadows of the Net: Breaking Free of Compulsive Online Sexual Behavior (2001), Patrick Carnes, David L. Delmonico & Elizabeth Griffin. Hazelden, Center City, MN.
Purity and Passion: Spiritual Truths about Intimacy That Will Strengthen Your Marriage Wendy L. Watson. Deseret Book
Wild at Heart: Discovering the Secret of a Man's Soul John Eldredge.
A Gentle Path Through the Twelve Steps: The Classic Guide for All People in the Process of Recovery (1993), Patrick Carnes.
Don't Call it Love: Recovery from Sexual Addiction (1991), Patrick Carnes.
Forgiving Ourselves: Getting Back Up When We Let Ourselves Down (2008). Wendy Ulrich, PhD. Deseret Book, Salt Lake City, UT
Mending a Shattered Heart: A Guide for Partners of Sex Addicts (2008), Stefanie Carnes, Editor. Gentle Path Press.
After the Affair: Healing the Pain and Rebuilding Trust When a Partner has been Unfaithful (1994), Janis Abrams Spring. Harper Collins Publishers
NOT "Just Friends": Rebuilding Trust and Recovering Your Sanity After Infidelity (2004), Shirley Glass and Jean Coppock Staeheli.
Affairs: A Guide to Working Through the Repercussions of Infidelity (1999), Emily M. Brown
Discussing Pornography Problems with a Spouse: Confronting and Disclosing Secret Behaviors (2002 & 2005), Rory C. Reid & Dan Gray. Mental Health Publications, Salt Lake City, UT
How Can I Forgive You? The Courage to Forgive, the Freedom Not To (2004), Janis Abrams Spring. Harper Collins Publishing, New York, NY
Infidelity on the Internet: Virtual Relationships and Real Betrayal (2001), Marlene M. Maheu & Rona B. Subotnik. Sourcebooks Inc., Naperville, Illinois
Living with Your Husband's Secret Wars (1999), Marsha Means. Fleming H. Revell, Grand Rapids, MI.
Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself Melody Beattie, Hazelden
The Dance of Intimacy Harriet G. Lerner. Harper & Row, New York, NY
The Dance of Anger: A Woman's Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships Harriet G. Lerner. Harper & Row, New York, NY
The Dance of Deception: A Guide to Authenticity and Truth-Telling in Women's Relationships Harriet G. Lerner. Harper & Row, New York, NY
Torn Apart By Porn by Diony George www.tornapartbyporn.com
Sex, Lies, and Forgiveness: Couples speak out on healing from sexual addiction (2004). Jennifer Schneider. Recovery Resources Press.
Take Back Your Marriage: Sticking Together in a World that Pulls Us Apart William J. Doherty, Guilford Press.
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work John M. Gottman. Three Rivers Press.
Purity and Passion: Spiritual Truths about Intimacy That Will Strengthen Your Marriage Wendy L. Watson, Deseret Book.
Rock-Solid Relationships: Strengthening Personal Relationships With Wisdom from the Scriptures Wendy L. Watson, Deseret Book
Open Hearts: Renewing Relationships with Recovery, Romance & Reality (1999), Patrick Carnes, Debra Laaser & Mark Laaser
Facing the Shadow: Starting Sexual & Relationship Recovery (2005), Patrick Carnes.
Divorce Busting: A Step-by-Step Approach to Making Your Marriage Loving Again Michele Weiner-Davis.
The Peacegiver: How Christ Offers to Heal our Hearts and Homes James L. Ferrell, Deseret Book.
Pornified:How Pornography is Transforming Our Lives, Our Relationships, and Our Families Pamela Paul.
Protecting Your Child in an X-Rated World: What You Need to Know to Make a Difference Frank York & Jan LaRue
Home Invasion: Protecting Your Family in a Culture that's Gone Stark Raving Mad Rebecca Hagelin.
How and When to Tell Your Kids About Sex: A Lifelong Approach to Shaping Your Child's Sexual Character Brenna & Stan Jones
Kids Ask About Sex: Honest Answers for Every Age Edited by Melissa R. Cox & the Medical Institute for Sexual Health
Ten Talks Parents Must Have with Their Children about Sex and Character Pepper Schwartz & Dominic Cappello.
Between Parent and Child: The Best-Selling Classic that Revolutionized Parent-Child Communication (2003). Haim Ginott, Alice Ginott, and H. Wallace Goddard. Three-Rivers Press.
What's the Big Deal about Pornography? A Guide for the Internet Generation (2008), Jill C. Manning. Shadow Mountain Press, Salt Lake City, UT.
Confronting Pornography: A Guide to Prevention and Recovery for Individuals, Loved Ones, and Leaders (2005), Mark Chamberlain, Dan Gray, & Rory Reid (Editors). Deseret Book, Salt Lake City, UT.
Infidelity on the Internet: Virtual Relationships and Real Betrayal (2001), Marlene M. Maheu & Rona B. Subotnik.
Healing the Wounds of Sexual Addiction (2004). Mark Laaser. Zondervan Publishing, Grand Rapids, Michigan.
In the Shadows of the Net: Breaking Free of Compulsive Online Sexual Behavior (2001), Patrick Carnes, David L. Delmonico & Elizabeth Griffin. Hazelden, Center City, MN.
Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction (2001), Patrick Carnes. Hazelden, Center City, MN.
www.faithfulandtrueministries.com
www.providentliving.com (LDS 12 step program)
Cedar City Review Article (online)
ADHD Article (pdf)
Long-term support for a wife dealing with husband's pornography addiction (pdf)
Procrastination and Sexual Addiction (pdf)
Quick Fix or Slow Cure (pdf)
Secrets and Isolation (pdf)
Three Second Rule (pdf)
Seeking Help (pdf)
The Hope of Lasting Change (online - LDS)
Open Letter From Former Pornography Addic (online - LDS)
What's a Woman to Do? (pdf)
RoadMap for Recovery (pdf)
First Steps Booklet (1.75 M)
Healthy Living Booklet (2.2 M)
Protecting Families From the Impact of Pornography - Audio MP3 (59.1 M)
Protecting Families From the Impact of Pornography - Power Point (6.06 M)
Differences between Healthy Sex and Pornography Sex (516 K)
Hazards of viewing pornography (68 K)
- Membership is open to all who share a desire to stop addictive sexual behavior. There is no other requirement.
- Our common goals are to become sexually healthy and to help other sex addicts achieve freedom from compulsive sexual behavior.
- SAA is supported through voluntary contributions from members.
- We are not affiliated with any other twelve-step programs, nor are we a part of any other organization. We do not support, endorse, or oppose outside causes or issues.
- Sex Addicts Anonymous is a spiritual program based on the principles and traditions of Alcoholics Anonymous.
Our primary purpose is to recover from the effects upon us of another person's sexaholism and to help the families and friends of sexaholics. S-Anon is a program of recovery for those who have been affected by someone else's sexual behavior. S-Anon is based on the Twelve Steps and the Twelve Traditions of Alcoholics Anonymous. We encourage you to browse our web site for information about the S-Anon program, or contact the S-Anon International Family Groups
World Service Office at:
TEL: (800) 210-8141 or (615) 833-3152
E-mail: sanon@sanon.org
Visit www.sexaa.org for more information, or you can contact them directly at www.SAfoundation.org
